Tuesday’s Lunchtime Links

I realized something yesterday. We have about 15 months until the Presidential election is over, but I already want to strangle every single person who starts pontificating on the topic. We need to make rules for this. Rule one: if someone starts talking about politics after 11 PM in any social gathering, you are allowed to give them a swift punch to the gut, no questions asked. That's a one-step fix right there. Rule two: you can only discuss scandalous rumors or conspiracy theories if you put a hundred bucks down that it comes true, 2:1 odds. Think everyone's favorite social conservative is secretly gay? Sure, you can talk about it, but if he's not tapping his feet under the stall, we all get paid for putting up with your shit. I'll have more later. For now:

Your Tuesday Lunchtime Links

• Warren Buffett takes liberals everywhere from six to midnight. (nytimes)


• This may be the best idea Paul Krugman has ever had. Obama, hire this man. He's ready for primetime. (huffpo)


• Now that they've perfected all internal operations, WMATA flexes its bureaucrat-speak for more federal support. (wapo)


• And now something for everyone: Obama, Bachmann, and Perry awkwardly eating corndogs. (theDC)


• Student loan debt skyrockets as the most popular post-grad plan remains "move into your parent's basement." (wsj)


• Dissatisfied with only partial destruction of our economy, Obama considers giving Freddie and Fannie new identities, putting them back in the driver's seat. (wapo)


• Rick Perry dives into Ron Paul territory and reporters everywhere remember how much they love hyperbole. (atlantic)


• Welcome to DC, where up is down, black is white, and giving thousands of guns to drug cartels gets you promoted. (latimes)


• President Obama is now on foursquare. I'm starting a pool on what happens first: a staffer accidentally checks into Camelot, or we compromise national security. (telegraph)


• Apparently, every mysterious creature is now a Chupacabra. Either way, I'm staying the hell out of Cheverly. (wapo)

The Hammer: LeBron James gets schooled by a Taiwanese kid and makes a total ass of himself. This must've happened in the fourth quarter.



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